Mercury Retrograde — Funny Astrology Sloth Tee · Woodcut Illustration

Mercury is going backward, and the sloth has been informed.

Emails misfire and group chats combust. A small teal planet turns back on itself, arrow and all. Nothing changes for a creature already at the slowest speed on offer.

He hangs upside down from a brass orrery of nested rings, engraved with mandalas and a crescent moon. Give it to the friend who announces every retrograde in the group chat before anyone asks.

Original AI-crafted artwork, printed to order on a heavyweight Comfort Colors 1717. 6.1 oz ringspun garment-dyed cotton, unisex fit. Runs slightly large; size down for fitted, stay true for the boxy drape.